Friday, March 12, 2010

Home from the egg retrieval!

Happy day!

Although it did not start off so happy. :) I don't typically write about things like this in my blog out of respect to my DH, but since it effected this big day I want to. We had a huge fight on the drive down to the RE's office, and while we are not perfect (ha!) and do fight, we don't fight very often...which made this extra upsetting. I just felt so discouraged that we were having an argument today of all days. I started feeling like we didn't even deserve to be parents if this is how we were acting. We had to go into the RE's before even resolving it, and all I could to was pray to Lord to have mercy on us in all our selfishness and sin!!

Thankfully, we were able to kiss and make up a little through some expressive eye contact as they took me back to get set up for the ER. The nurse anesthesiologist was amazingly friendly, and I could tell she saw it as part of her job to help the patient feel as calm and comfortable as possible before, during, and after the procedure. She did a wonderful job at calming me down, which I was especially thankful for after a rocky start to the morning. The ER room was actually quite comfortable - a super padded table, pillow, a heating pad that had warmed the table, and a blanket. I got to keep the heating pad on me, too. :)

The RE stopped by briefly to say hello, and went to see one other patient before my ER. In this window of time the nurse began the anesthesia, and that first feeling of wooziness is such a strange one. Of course, the next thing I knew I was in the recovery room, groggy but feeling fine. They brought DH in, gave me some gatorade, and monitored me for a little while longer. I felt so happy that we had gotten some eggs, and quite relaxed thanks to the meds.

I am a little confused about how many eggs we actually got, but, ultimately, it was well within the range we were hoping for (which was 3-5). When I woke up the nurse told me 4, but the RE later said 7 but that not all of them were mature or good-looking. Either way, we are thrilled and thankful with our {most likely} 4 eggs. I can't believe I spent most of the time stimming worrying that we may only get 1-2. And, Betty, you get a gold star - you commented back then that you would play armchair RE and guess we would get more than the 1-2. You were right. :)

DH & I were then left with the decision of how many to fertilize. After talking to the RE, praying, discussing, almost deciding on 2, talking to the RE again, and praying again, we ended up deciding to ICSI 3. Thankfully, we have a lot of peace about the decision. Although our RE does not share the same beliefs that we do about the beginning of life, he has been wonderfully supportive in wanting to do this in a manner that we are happy with. He thought 3 would be a reasonable number to give us the best chance of success while still ensuring we would not have any "extra" embryos, but also said the actual likelihood of having all 3 fertilize and then grow is very, very small.

Now we wait and see if any/ how many fertilize and grow. We are praying that 1-2 of those egg and sperm combos are viable and would grow to become a healthy baby (or babies)!! I was expecting to feel some anxiety about fertilization and embryo growth, but so far I am just so thankful and relieved to be here - done with stims, done with the ER, and with some eggs to work with. Not that any of it was ever in my control, but I have this deep understanding at the moment that whatever happens from here on out is completely in the Lord's hands and not mine. It is comforting and freeing to know, and I am praying I hold onto that truth and turn from fear and anxious thoughts.

Oh, and about that fight? DH & I were completely over it once we saw each other in recovery. I think for me a lot of it stemmed from the stress of the day, which we think also rubbed off on DH. We were a hungry, sorry, stressed out couple of infertiles who had lost some perspective at the moment and let our selfish natures take over. Thankfully we were able to see this after the fact and had a real make-up over lunch. :)

22 comments:

kdactyl said...

Hillary....I've been checking in all day to see how it went. So happy to hear the great ER numbers. Sorry about the fight with DH...I think you are right. I just think all the stress is often too much to take and it just bubbles up at the strangest times.

I am excited to hear about your fert report. I really pray you end up with two great embryos to transfer.

Many hugs. We did our FET yesterday so I am on bed rest through tomorrow. We will almost be cycle buddies. I will be praying for us both.

kd

Krystal said...

I'm glad it went so well! I'm praying you get great results!

twondra said...

Glad it went well sweetie! I was praying for you today! Sorry about the fight with your hubby. Glad it's worked out, though! (((HUGS)))

One Who Understands said...

4 eggs is great! Praying that 2 wonderful beautiful embies are growing stong tomorrow!

andreajennine said...

What a wonderful report! I think fertilizing 3 sounds like a good decision. Praying the best for ALL of you!

Melody said...

whoo-hoo on the four eggs! That's awesome. And thanks for sharing about the little spat on the way down to the RE's office....just lets us know ya'll are normal like the rest of us.

Amanda said...

I'm so glad your retrevial went well. It might help you to know the day of our successful IUI me and DH got into a bit of a fight because he wanted to leave after he gave his sample and I wanted him to stay for the IUI. A bit of stress and a few tears worked out just fine for us.

AplusB said...

Perfect! You got the perfect number of eggs! I am so happy for you, Hillary. Everything is working out just as you'd hoped. Fingers crossed for great embryo growth in the coming days.

Melis.sa said...

I'm sorry about the rough start to the day, but I am so excited for you guys!!! I have such hope that you two will become parents soon!! ((HUGS))

Rach said...

Great news!! Super happy for you. Everything is falling into place.

Stefanie Blakely said...

What a big day. I'm so hopeful for you!!

Amber said...

I am so excited to hear about the fertilization report. Praying for 2 healthy embryos!!!

wait, what? said...

So happy it well well! I hope you get a great fert report!

Leah said...

So happy it went well! Yay! :-D I think the fights during infertility are so normal. Unfortunately sometimes the stress just becomes too much. And making up is always fun. :D

gringa78 said...

I'm so happy things went well and so happy you chose 3 to ICSI!! You have such great chances and I'm so hopeful for you. Take good care of yourself and don't worry about the fight...IF is incredibly stressful on both people and sometimes it just all comes to a head at once. Go easy on yourself. :)

Sarah said...

Yay! Exciting post :) I'll be praying for you. And glad to hear you and your hubby made up! :)

julie said...

Congratulations on a successful egg retrieval! I hope you have a perfect embryo to implant in a few days.
(But it's okay if it's not perfect, mine wasn't but it still stuck..!) (-:

Heather said...

So excited everything went well, and glad that fight is far behind you. We don't argue often either, but when we do, it makes everything so much harder.

Praying for your little ones that are growing, and praying for your mommy heart as you anxiously await a report!

Caroline said...

Hi Hillary,

What a great outcome to a difficult and stressful few weeks. I will be praying for you!! xx

Kelli said...

Hillary!! Wonderful news!! I'm so excited for you, dh, and your little embies. Praying that peace continues to cover you over the next few weeks and that your BFP will be here soon! xoxo

A said...

I am so excited for you- you've been at the forefront of my prayers the last couple days! I think the number of eggs sounds perfect :) Now we wait to see what awesome things God has in store for you!!

stillwaitingformysunshine said...

so happy you got so many eggs!!

also - my DH and i have fought everytime before an IUI...we'll probably do it before ivf too...it's so hormonally charged and stressful. i think it's probably common

21reena