Monday, June 1, 2009

A new day

One interesting aspect of blogging is that it captures my emotions, thoughts, and fears of one instance of time. It's a snapshot that might not be what I'm thinking most of the time, or even some of the time.

My last post was one that I had indeed been mulling over in my head all week...but it wasn't emotional. It was this abstract thought that I cannot imagine treatments working. But then it became emotional in that moment of time, and I'll tell you what set it off: a nurse at the RE's office.

I called to inform them that my surgery had been completed and that I'll plan on calling them after two AF's. And I asked what the plan was...an IUI, perhaps? Of course the nurse said we'll have to talk to Dr. RE about the plan (which I understand), and Dr. RE wants another SA in 2 months. But I pressed harder. "What if the next SA shows the same results? Could we do an IUI?"

In her most hesitant, infuriating voice, "Welllll, you miiiight be able to do an IUI with thooooose numbers."

I got off the phone and wrote that post.

And later I talked about the conversation with my DH, and we confirmed that some of the other things she said about DH's SA were flat-out wrong. I don't think she knew much about MFI. I'll talk to the Uro and Dr. RE next time.

14 comments:

Kelli said...

I think every nurse in an RE's office should have to pass a sensitivity training! I had one laugh out loud at me once for hoping Clomid would work...not nice.

Hope the other docs are more helpful! xo

Betty Rubble said...

I so agree with Kelli...HOWEVER,

we also need to remember (and its unfortunate) that the "game" of infertility treatments is ALL about numbers. IVF is pushed because IUI isn't as successful as quickly. Thus moving on to IVF makes the clinic look better by having say a 60% success rate with IVF than a 20% success rate with IUI (and i don't know if those numbers are accurate).

THUS my recommendation is that you follow YOUR HEART and YOUR MIND hwen making a decision on the plan! 20,000 is what is need for an IUI here in Bedrock,and i believe that your hubby had that.

Jen said...

ugh! nothing frustrates me more that the nurses... the last time i went for an IF appt, the nurse said, "now are you using any form of contraception?" there was the longest pause of silence b/c i truly did not know how to react!!! i hope the doc explains the future steps to you clearly and i hope you do get to do an IUI!

'Murgdan' said...

No offense to nurses...but you never know what they know. The first nurse who reported my hubbys SA to me told me "It's not that bad.".....with a count of 1 million and 0% morph. That is THAT bad (IUI was not an option for us). Or maybe she had a different point of view...?

I now save some of my more important questions for the doc...since it will ultimately be a decision made between us and him.

Hope the doc is more helpful for you.

Melissa said...

word to the above comments. seriously some of my encounters with nurses at the RE's office have been less than wonderful. hopefully she won't be your nurse at your appts

TheDales said...

Maybe you could call your RE's office and ask for him to call you. This way you can ensure you're getting the right answers.

Erica said...

Definitely don't bother asking questions to the nurses - you can get GREAT ones or ROTTEN ones! It's best to stick to the docs if you can. I'm sorry she was such an ass. You would think sensitivity would be part of the required personality traits in this industry, too bad it isn't.

I totally get what you're saying about the blog capturing you at that exact moment. I've looked back on things I've written and thought - oh god, I sound like a psychopath!

Have a great week, Hillary!

Mary said...

Well, at least in two months you will be moving on to something. That makes me happy for you. In two months treatment will be in progress and you will be on your way to a baby. I'm hoping that DH's numbers continue to rise over that period of time and you get to do IUI. Just think...THIS summer you will begin treatment. Yay!

Amber said...

RE nurses should definitely be competent on each level its so important so sorry to hear that she wasnt.

Mrs. Hammer said...

One thing I've learned is that I had to 'test' my RE's nurse. I knew what the results of a certain lab test would tell me but I asked her anyway once they came in. When she gave me a poor answer I knew that she would not be the one to ask further questions to.

I now write down all my questions and carry them with me whenever I see my RE. AND I write down the answers he tells me. Because you would be surprise how quickly they fly out of your head. They probably think I'm a crazy 'notepad lady' but I don't care. It's all so overwhelming I have to do something to keep my head on straight. Plus it's the best way I've found to keep educated and proactive for our future family :)

Infertility is Hard said...

Gosh - Don't you just love getting jerked around? I think there needs to be a major reform in reproductive medicine. . . period. It's like, they don't recognize how important this is to all of us.

The Wife said...

Arg those nurses! The stories I could tell about R., our RE nurse. Even the hubby shares my frustration with her. Just keep pushing until you get answers you're satisfied with. I've spent some afternoons going back and forth with them until I got the answer I needed from the RE.

jones said...

I think that every nurse and DOCTOR should have that training! And I completely agree about the snapshot nature of blogging. great post.

N said...

Wow! I feel like i've learned a lot from your reader comments!!! I'm going to take notes and write down answers like Mrs hammer said!
P.S. I tagged you on my blog!